This is me!

So, since choosing to be sober since this past summer, following a season of obsessive reading about alcohol, all things sobriety, journeys of others, listening to podcasts, etc, etc… I find myself in a new situation. A sober situation. So. I decided to write my sober situations down here for those to whom might find them:

• helpful
• funny
• encouraging
• silly
• guiding
• life-giving
• urging
• annoying
• jubilating
• doable
• impossible
• breathable

I have dabbled with being totally sober. Periods of total abstinence, followed by the inevitable regular drinking habit sneaking back in. I find it über hard in our culture where it’s either A or B really. A, just beginning to drink alcohol and labeling oneself a “normal drinker”…or B, finding oneself at the end of a scary road of being totally dependent and addicted to alcohol. My nemesis: the moderate or occasional drinker aka, normal drinker. The “one glass only please” people or the, “only on Friday” peeps. I SO wanted to be you. For SO long I tried to be you and for a few first drinking years, I totally was you. But as said before…only Fridays turned into Thursdays and Fridays…why not add Saturdays too, it’s the weekend after all . And then Sundays are for relaxing so throw in that day as well. Mondays were that hard day of getting back into the weekly routine…so ok..Mondays too. Tuesdays are just Tuesdays. Why not Tuesdays? Wednesdays…hump day, a glass or three will do just fine thank you. And then…back to our lovely Thursdays. I’ve journaled and read and listened and read and journaled and chatted and cried and been round and round and round…and it has just had to stop. I found two things to be true. One, that I was at the end of the round and round and was ready for the end. And almost as important, two, through research, and being honest with myself and open…I found there was a new beginning. And this blog contains my thoughts, my sober situations, and perhaps, my not so sober situations as well. My end…but definitely, joyously, happily, thankfully…my new beginning.